This is probably the funniest thing I have read from General JC Christian Patriot.

There could be only one explanation for OfJoshua’s pregnancy: immaculate conception. It was a miracle. OfJoshua was chosen by God to be the vessel for our Lord Jesus’ second coming.

We were ecstatic. I immediately reached for my CB radio so that I could begin witnessing Our Savior’s imminent return. But before I uttered my second “breaker” into the microphone, the Holy Ghost intervened, filling my thoughts with visions of Klinton dressed in the robes and crown of Herrod. The Spirit was telling me that I had to guard the secret of the Second Coming to prevent Klinton from murdering our baby like he murdered Vince Foster and the entire population of Mena, Arkansas.

I asked Of Joshua if she had confided in anyone else knew. She said she’d only told Mr. Garcia, our sad neighbor man. That made sense. He’s been distraught since his divorce, so she visits him after dinner every night to cheer him up with scripture readings and old Lou Rawls albums. The news of her pregnancy probably filled him with joy.

Oh man… I love The General… in a manly heterosexual kind of way of course.